When I first take a lover
And I take off my clothes
I take off a secret that nobody knows
Written in silent stretch marks on my hips
And maybe told a bit by the size of my lips
That my body was supposed to be fat.
I started Weight Watchers when other kids were starting…
Since I was young,
I prided myself on arithmetic
and the ability of my brain to recall
dates, numbers, and the dying words
of artists whose names
I forced my tongue to wrap around.
But I did it.
I lived by books when people were scarce.
I once found someone that brought chills to my spine with the way she walked.
I searched for her name in the mouths of strangers
In hopes that one day I could sit as close to her as they did.
And I fell in love with the way she spoke
In dark tones